Firsts !

Woah, this has thrown me somewhat !

A concoction of emotions has rocked up over the past few days, I believe due to this. My son’s first birthday without his Dad 🎂

It sure is a weird, unexplainable feeling & one I can’t put my finger on, I can’t anticipate, I’m not sure I can understand & don’t seem to have a coping strategy. Not feeling in control is always a scary zone to be in.

However, the past few months have highlighted how CONTROL is not possible in most cases … falling into what’s happening around us … choosing to go with the flow, let the emotions roll, don’t worry if they make no sense … go with it & control what you can in the moment.

So, today the focus is on celebration, going with the flow … as I can’t control how my son will be feeling … grief & the littlest games it plays are bigger, stronger & more powerful than I’ll ever be.

Regardless of everything … I can control this …

There will be LOVE ❤ surrounding him.

There will be cake 🎂

There will be light ☀

There will be tears ( healthy ) 😢

There will be a variety of emotions , including JOY at celebrating with a bunch of gorgeous mates. 😀 😊

There will be memories made. ❤

There will never be a first birthday without Dad for him again, ever. ⭐

Ahhh, that feels better - maybe I have more control than I thought 😉

Now, where are those candles ?

👌 

Michelle X